One day in my writing workshop class, we were doing an activity in which the class would be proposed a controversial or thought provoking question and then would have to move to either side of the room to show what we believed about the question; then we would have to defend our answer. After a few questions about karma and soul mates which naturally digressed into off-topic and irrelevant debates, a question along these lines was asked: "Can putting on a smile make you happier?"
Now the first thing to come to my mind was one of those commercials for anti-depression drugs where the solemn-faced actors would hold up smiling paper masks in front of their faces, ostensibly invisible to the other actors in the scene. Despite the image immediately conjured in my mind, I went to the side for those who agreed with the statement, or rather, thought that smiling can make you happier. This may be the fact that I was in one of those controversial moods and found startling joy in disagreeing with the majority of my class, but after a few moments of thought as I prepared my defense, I had a startling enlightenment, or rather, a clear revelation of something that I had always held as true, yet never openly realised.
Happiness is all about attitude. Attitude is all about how you react to your circumstances. One of my favorite sayings, an aphorism I hold extremely true and motivating, is "You are not defined by your circumstances." This sums up most of my life philosophy. You cannot necessarily control your circumstances, just how you react to them. If there's nothing you can do about something, take it as it comes and do the best you can with it. Charles R. Swindoll, a kindred spirit of mine apparently, said "Life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% how you react to it." This just reiterates what I have already stated. You determine if you are happy or not.
Happiness is something created by you based on your opinion. I may not be happy out in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean sailing in a boat, but there are plenty of people who would. Likewise I may be happy sitting at a piano just tinkering around for and hour or two while others may find little to no joy in that. The circumstances did not change, just the people and their attitudes towards these activities. Happiness is something you create, something you determine, and with enough will power, you can make yourself happy in any situation. The secret, in my case, is finding the hidden humor in life.
The ability to find humor in any situation is a very valuable gift. A favorite quote of mine is "You can't make it through life without a good sense of humor." This is very true. How I cope with unfair situations, rude or disagreeable people, or huge inconveniences is by finding something to laugh about. Laughing is my coping mechanism. Whenever I am scared or put into a tough situation, I laugh about it. Whether I am laughing at some irony or the sheer chances of my luck, more often brought about by my own stupidity, I laugh at it, or at least consciously recognize the humor in the situation. Once I can laugh at something, it becomes less scary to me, less powerful or untouchable.
Now keep in mind, this may not work for everyone. This is simply what works for me. This is how I can get through such a thing as life with not to many scratches; don't take yourself too seriously and be willing and ready to laugh is my advice to you. As I said, this may work for you sometimes, this may not work for you all the time, and this may not work for you at all. But I would encourage all of you to try to laugh a bit more. You may just find it therapeutic.
Though I do not listen to comedians too often, here is a link to one of my favorites:
I think you've explained it once in class before, but I guess in a sense if you are upset, you can make yourself happier if you just try. Personal story but if I get upset I just have to remember I have a guy that calls me muffin ^^ And that makes me super happy!
ReplyDeletewow well said.
ReplyDeletethat's amazing i loved it
ReplyDeleteI love reading your work!! You have such a great way with words.
ReplyDeleteWhy do you make me think about all these emotions and such? This writing is absolutely amazing though!
ReplyDeletetruly inspirational.
ReplyDeleteYour writing is so good and very inspiring
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely loved this! Attitude is so much about life. I resonate with your quote about how you handle your circumstances. I try to look for the good in all situations. Sometimes, I have to look hard, but eventually you can find it if you look!
ReplyDelete